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Chris Cohen (34)

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  • If I were a Girl

    If I were a Girl New episode

    If I were a girl Even just for a day Id roll outta bed in the morning And see just how much noise I could make Id start drying my hair Youre still asleep I dont care I put all the lights on in the bedroom Turn the TV up to full volume too Its just what us girls do If I were a girl Id spend my day being mad Id blame it on my hormones And burst out crying even when Im not sad Id say that Im fine Then not speak for the day Say nothings wrong when you ask me Then Id still be bloody angry And start arguing when you get to bed If I were a girl Id always moan bout my weight Say Im fat and ugly Even though I know Im still a size eight Id demand equal rights But then wanna walk through doors first Id say all men are perverts And then wear a stupidly revealing skirt Id say Im independent That I dont need no man Then Id expect you pay For meals and nights out we plan Id want to have it both ways, Is that really so wrong?

    • 04/02/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 2

  • Fizzee Barstool - Dance Wiv Me Chris Cohen

    Fizzee Barstool - Dance Wiv Me Chris Cohen New episode

    The original song* by Fizzy Barstool, Dance Wiv Me *not original

    • 04/02/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • Chris Cohen - I Kissed your Mum

    Chris Cohen - I Kissed your Mum New episode

    Why you shouldn't let Chris have a drink on a Thursday. Lyrics: I never even knew her name It was always just Mrs D I met her when we were at school And I came round to yours for tea But last night, you were out And she asked me to come in And then it happened suddenly On top of your ironing I kissed your mum and I like it The taste of old womens lipstick I used my tongue just to try it I hope you and your dad dont mind it It felt so wrong, it felt so right Your mums quite hot in a certain light I kissed your mum and I like it. I liked it That day when I didnt show for work, Was with your mum at Tescos She even lifted up her shirt, By the jersey royal potatoes Yeah shes quite old, and wrinkly too But her lips felt just like silk And she got a ladder in her tights, By the semi skimmed milk I kissed your Mum and I liked it, While we were watching countdown I used my tongue just to try it Next week well get your gran round I know its wrong, But it feels so right, Guess you and I wont be going out Friday night Your mum she is so beautiful Soft lips, dodgy hip, and a bit of stubble Cant use the bath cos she wont fit She uses , the shower, Aint no big deal at least shes clean I kissed your mum and l liked it, While you were playing Xbox We used your bed just to try it, I didnt even take off my socks, It felt so wrong, But it felt so right, But I hope you and I are still alright Cos I bedded your mum and I liked it I liked it

    • 09/01/2009
    • Comments: 1
    • Votes: 2

  • Chris Cohen at the Olympic Games

    Chris Cohen at the Olympic Games New episode

    Chris Cohen's coverage of the Olympic Games.

    • 09/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • Bargain Hunt - Only a little more disturbed

    Bargain Hunt - Only a little more disturbed New episode

    Chris Cohen's take on Bargain Hunt.

    • 09/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • Neighbours - Angus and Rachel fall out

    Neighbours - Angus and Rachel fall out New episode

    Angus and Rachel have a Facebook related disagreement.

    • 09/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • Jeremy Kyle - My Partner Ate my Baby

    Jeremy Kyle - My Partner Ate my Baby New episode

    Another everyday saga solved by the magical Jeremy Kyle

    • 09/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • Chris Cohen - Live on Setanta Sports News

    Chris Cohen - Live on Setanta Sports News New episode

    Chris Cohen live on Setanta Sports News at Christmas

    • 09/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • A Team Called Palace - Chris Cohen

    A Team Called Palace - Chris Cohen New episode

    Lyrics copyright 'ChrisCohenMusic' 2008 Music copyright 'The Jam' 2008 One for the Palace fans! Lyrics On Saturdays down at Selhurst Park- We'll have a drink and a moan Looking -back to all those rosey days ..

    • 08/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 1

  • Chris Cohen - Checkout Lady

    Chris Cohen - Checkout Lady New episode

    Oh baby, I see you looking at me on your swivelly chair by the till You want me don't ya? I was in the supermarket just the other day The Supermarket baby --

    • 08/01/2009
    • Comments: 0
    • Votes: 2
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